how can i match phyrdl(its 35/36 on one stick and 37/38 on other)

ive tried: higher cl, disabling gdm, 1.5 vddq and vddio(vddio didnt apply and was at 1.4), 1.9 vpp(didnt apply), higher vddp(didnt apply), higher vdd misc(didnt apply)

also why arent the voltages im setting in bios not applying